What is the ironic benefit of a dramatic life and too much chocolate? The migraine. I have been blessed with said benefit since the age of 8 and although my toleration has grown the overall experience could be completly done away with and I would have not once second of regret. The migraine is just a physical (painfully so) reminder that I'm stressed, that I'm not getting any in a committed relationship, that I still need to find a job and at this rate it will be one that exists at an alarming 28 k a year, did I mention I will be living in the DC area, 28k will be the cost of my yearly commute, to hell with a life. And finally the lovely migraine is a physical draining reminder that I care too much, feel too much, want too much, and that dammit I can't eat a Tootsie Roll for fear of a week of tortuous side effects, including screwed vision... and I ask, what DID I do in a past life, because if this is my punishment I must have been an evil sorceress.
So I ask, what is a suffering former sorceress to do? I could lay in my bed until the double vision/unfocused vision goes away...at which point its likely that I will have aged 5 years, so that option is unlikely. I could ignore those pressing issues which have stressed me out anyway, I mean so what I've been relegated to the status of second best...fuck that shit. I could drink, but then I'm not ready for the opening stages of alcoholism, or the hangover accompanied by a new round of migraine, and alcoholism is really unattractive anyway. Or I can just deal with it. In the years of my life, the majority, in which everything seems like a smiting from the powers that be, I've learned to deal with it because although "it could be better it could be a lot worse".
Honestly I'm slightly fed up with that phrase, ignore the fact that I came up with it. I deal, and I deal, and I deal. I deal with the crappy father, the crappy guy, the crappy here and now. But I can't control the world around me, I can on the other hand control my reaction to it, and so I DEAL. If only for one moment I had a little more control...
If only I could channel that inner sorceress...evil or not...but if this is what I got for the past life, I'm assuming Dung Beetle would be the next rung on this ladder of proportionate punishment and that is just something I cannot deal with.
**fIreFly**
So I ask, what is a suffering former sorceress to do? I could lay in my bed until the double vision/unfocused vision goes away...at which point its likely that I will have aged 5 years, so that option is unlikely. I could ignore those pressing issues which have stressed me out anyway, I mean so what I've been relegated to the status of second best...fuck that shit. I could drink, but then I'm not ready for the opening stages of alcoholism, or the hangover accompanied by a new round of migraine, and alcoholism is really unattractive anyway. Or I can just deal with it. In the years of my life, the majority, in which everything seems like a smiting from the powers that be, I've learned to deal with it because although "it could be better it could be a lot worse".
Honestly I'm slightly fed up with that phrase, ignore the fact that I came up with it. I deal, and I deal, and I deal. I deal with the crappy father, the crappy guy, the crappy here and now. But I can't control the world around me, I can on the other hand control my reaction to it, and so I DEAL. If only for one moment I had a little more control...
If only I could channel that inner sorceress...evil or not...but if this is what I got for the past life, I'm assuming Dung Beetle would be the next rung on this ladder of proportionate punishment and that is just something I cannot deal with.
**fIreFly**
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