Skip to main content

Hassle Free, not just for Capital One

"They should call it a hassle not a "companion". That way when someone is like, "hey can I be your hassle" you can be like...No."

I altered that quote slightly from its original context for the purposes of my post, but it has the same general point. No one exhibiting any signs of a normal state of being gets involved in something for the negatively dramatic hassle which will emerge. A relationship, no matter what form it may take, is created in order to benefit the parties involved, not in order to further some sadomasochistic need for self torture... Well unless both parties are sadomasochist but lets overlook that preference for the sake of this conversation.

If I wanted yet another hassle to emerge from my life, specifically one which is very much unnecessary I'd do something which could have the potential for pleasure, even the insignificant, fleeting moment of pleasure; yes that's it I would take up alcoholism, Pomegranate Bacardi Smoothies to be exact. Everyday, 3 times a day...I would have 30 minute periods of "Eww Happy" to then be stamped out by the in between bought of self loathing, loneliness, and misery. This would be an acceptable replacement to my current hassle because self loathing, loneliness, and misery seems to exude greatly from it, yet the Eww Happy seems to have died off like a herd of prehistoric mastodons; but I've mentioned before why alcoholism isn't for me unattractive, etc, and just the same the hassle is not for me either.

It is somewhat sad to see something you've put so much effort into be atrophied to a state of insignificant, hassle. From the beginning conversations where I let him explain football to me( I'd like to emphasize the Let Him because I could honestly have never had that explanation and have been perfectly content with my life), to the middle where I not only LET him but WANTED him to kiss my back and curl up beside me, and now to the point where he has obtained classification, in the cold, dark, deep filing cabinet labeled Hassle.

The object of my affection has become a hassle, something that causes unnecessary agitation, discontent, and questioning...questioning of myself and I won't allow that to continue.

I WON'T. I love it when I'm all assertive.

I won't allow myself to wonder what I did wrong, or if I should have been less sarcastic that time on the phone.
I won't allow myself to be maintained through phone calls made on his way from point A to point B (thanks to Melanie's recent post for making me realize that those are Maintenance Calls).
I won't allow myself to fall prey to his late night "let's hang out" calls (ladies if you ain't gettin it...it defined as anything at all that you want, he aint' gettin it).
Finally I will not allow myself to feel guilty for abandoning the remaining fragments of a friendship which has been tainted by the presence of some temporary, romantic, flight of fancy.

I Won't. Life goes on, the beat goes on, now let's move on.

**FiReFlY**

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The United Nations...Here and Now

"I am the first to admit I have dated all around the world, as a matter of fact a former friend and I would call ourselves the UN (United Nations). As a young black woman I had the all too common experience of growing up in a predominantly white southern town, on the daily seeing racism in ways that some may never know, I also had the benefit of a very diverse family who would break the mold just as well as hold it in place..." In continuation from the previous post on this issue, yes, I have dated outside of my race with frequency. It still amazes me how a visual characteristic can have such an unwavering hold on the minds and lives of people that it remains one of the most predominant issues of hot debate. The discussion of race is necessary to rid us of those misconceptions we may have about others at the same time I think in some ways the constant discussion of race just serves to continually draw attention to the subtle insignificant differences between people, its a ver...

...it's got me feeling some kind of way...

Sometimes I think I am a bit of a romantic. I love happy endings and the roads that lead to them. I think the stumbles and tumbles that two people take just to be together are precious and beautiful. I read of love, and watch it in movies, and ever since I was a little girl dreamed about what my love would look like. I played with my Barbie dolls and planned out their lives, always a successful Barbie coming home to her successful husband in their beautiful home, with their beautiful cars but even as a little girl I recognized all the falls that happen in falling in love. And boy did those dolls have some realistic falls. As a child I was always quite observant so to me Barbie dealing with the highs and lows of her interracial love was not a stretch. Barbie home with the kids terrified when Ken, well Steven went off to war and waiting for him to return home to her. Shani searching for Jamal when the imaginary tornado touched down on their RV, all the while endlessly connected in their ...

The Family is Moving In...AHHHH!

In what seems to be a new overnight sensation, the older generations of my family have now acquired Facebook accounts. I say an overnight sensation because its like the Facebook account has qualities similar to an economic stimulus rebate check, everybody could get one so everybody wanted one. Initially I took this on with amusement, my aunt learning the ways of The Book. And we all remember how it started so long ago, and if not let me tell. When I got Facebook it was a few years back when this was some obscure social networking site that only a few random college campuses had aquired access to. I first heard about the book from my friend Mike, at UMASS, at the time and was a bit peeved when I tried to get my own account and discovered that those Pearly Gates were not opening...ACCESS DENIED. I would check back everyonce in a while, it seemed like slowly word spread until finally one day on campus I heard, "Yea we gotFacebook". WHAT???!!! I was never so excited in my life, a...