The Life of a Premature Metro Goddess

I feel a bit trapped. I keep wondering why I return to this place where I can't see the Sun, where I feel as if I'm stuck in a pit of emotion that I can't work through, can't get out of. It's amazing how I've come to believe that my past really hasn't affected my present, and yet I am sitting here today, writing this today, feeling the way I do again today. I have daddy issues...A complex web of years isolated, and lectured to, and sat aside to which I said I was ok, and I'm not. I am angry, I am hurt, and I am furious. No matter how mature I am no matter how many years I have progressed into adulthood there is still a part of me which is a little girl wondering why her parents can never get along. Why my parents can't work together to create someplace where I am safe and stable. I am angry at my parents for putting their anger before my well being. I am angry at my father for making excuses, not understanding, talking around me like a well ver

This blog will be a little bit of Ashley thinking on paper. Some of my opinions are still being formed so keep and open mind. The Down Low; I’m sure we’ve all had some form of exposure to this modern concept, phrase, and/or lifestyle. The term has evolved quite far from R. Kelly’s original video concept of keeping his secret affair on the down low…Well that is until the boss’s men came in and found the boss’s girl with the boss’s boy (Kelly) and that’s when the shit hit the fan… oh how I reminisce. But let’s play catch up. For you who aren’t familiar with the term a brief overview brought to you courtesy of Urban Dictionary.com… { refers to when closeted black men leading mostly heterosexual lives seek other men for sex that is often anonymus and unprotected } oh I love the internet. Although the terminology for this lifestyle has only recently been established, there have always been men, and women for that matter, living in the confines of a traditional heterosexual marriage whi

I have a cold, I am pmsing, and there is a Tropical Depression, Ernesto, who has managed to complete the whole ruining process of my weekend. I have a cold. And although I am one of those “don’t do the medicated bullshit” type of girls, I’ve been doped up all day long on Dayquil and in about an hour it will be Nyquil…gel caps because I DON’T DO LIQUIDS… hell I’m not a child. I know how to swallow (and don’t make that last statement into something it shouldn’t be). I am pmsing which my boyfriend likes to refer to that as “During These Times”. And you know all those stereotypical lies that men continue to plant into our social subconscious about women being these over emotional creature who could cry at the drop of a hat… well I hate to say it but sometimes that shit it true. There was this one time when I was younger that for some reason my mother screwed up the food order and I didn’t get my double bacon cheeseburger with lettuce and mayo (Dairy Queen)… I screamed, I cried, and th